What does it really mean to be a friend?
Something that has been knocking around my brain when trying to answer this question is the issue of vulnerability. Friends, or my definition of true friends, are people you feel you can be vulnerable with. For me that doesn't happen very often. Honestly, I'm the kind of guy who loves to talk but I don't usually simply pour forth my life story on first contact. Now I'm not saying that there are a lot of people who do pour forth on first contact, but its a perspective I've been considering.
Yet, neither am I the kind of guy who can simply sit there and never partake in the conversation. Recently I've been reminded that counselors (of which I'm studying to become one) are often stigmatized for simply wanting to "fix" people. Being perfectly honest I do have an element of that in me, but I'm not sitting quietly simply because I want to analyze or pick apart everything somebody says. I naturally DO enjoy listening to other people. Yes, I have problems and issues in my life as well, but my own issues are placed on the back-burner when listening to the struggles of others.
And if they feel comfortable around me to share what they are dealing with, who am I to barge ahead with my own issues? Is that one reason why I think God is directing me into the field of counseling? Absolutely! But that doesn't mean that I don't enjoy talking myself! I guess the whole point of some of this thought process has been to help me recognize that I need to be more vulnerable around other people. They are taking a chance on me so why can't I take a chance on them?
Another point of this post is to express my willingness to be vulnerable with other people. But often that vulnerability is on my own terms. Literally no question is off-limits with me. If somebody honestly asks the question I then know they want to hear the answer. So if you really want to get to know me ask questions. There are times that I will express my opinion without being asked, but for the most part, questions are the way to go with me.
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