Thoughts

Alright, time for a more serious post (both in length and content). I'm definitely battering some thoughts around in my head and I'm trying to decide which one to pull out and ponder aloud. Hmm...I guess I'll go with standards and convictions.

Today was an absolutely incredible day here in New England and as such, I wanted to make sure and spend some good quality time outdoors. So, I did. At least four hours worth. Spent chatting (since I can't be outside and NOT be around people) with some of my fabulous neighbors. Among many topics of discussion, both sublime and ridiculous, standards and convictions came up. Now I have been mulling some of these thoughts over for a long time, but it was nice to have a refresher of the subject and discuss it with good friends. The subject? Well you already know what it is. Personal convictions and standards.

When talking with non-Christians there tends to be an easier explanation for standards and convictions. In other words there is the ability to say to a non-Christian, "Hey I don't smoke because I'm a Christian" or "Hey, I don't live with my girlfriend [figment of the imagination for me personally] because I am a Christian". And they can question me further and I'll be glad to explain why I hold to those standards. Non-Christians may not understand the reasoning for why I'm making the choice that I am, but they respect the choice as my own and as a religious conviction.

The real dicey situation comes when you are trying to talk to a fellow Christian who does not hold the same standards or convictions. Now you can no longer say, "Hey I don't drink because I'm a Christian" and they will curiously ask questions for the benefit of greater understanding of you and your religious beliefs, and then leave you alone to practice how you feel God has led you. Instead they will question your standards and, sometimes, feel funny because they don't have those same standards. It's really sad but some Christians who are not big enough to understand God's greatness and His ability to lead some to adhere to a scriptural or personal standard, while at the same time not leading them in that same standard, try to undermine or question with a super critical spirit. Personally, I don't mind if believers question my own standards or convictions as long as it is not with a critical spirit/attitude and they are really trying to understand how God has led me. The other caveat which I allow is if a fellow brother or sister in Christ is really concerned that I may have missed something that God has shown me and are trying to help straighten me out (with humility and a gentle spirit). That is the ultimate beauty of the body of Christ! The ability to live in community and help and encourage one another. I never want to be accused of not listening to a fellow Christian and not adequately working something out between me and God. If I need to re-evaluate my standard or conviction, I will. The Holy Spirit is incredibly faithful when it comes to leading those who earnestly ask him.

Why do some Christians react so strongly to standards held by other Christians but not they themselves? I think there may be two answers. Of course, I may have missed some, but these are some of what I thought about. First, they feel downright guilty. They know they should be held to a higher standard of conduct and living and they don't want to hear you are holding to the very standard they know they should themselves cling to. Scripture admonishes us along this line in Romans 14:4-19. We as believers have to get our bearings from God and deal with the scorn or contempt of other brothers and sisters in the Lord. Secondly, I believe the enemy of our souls has used convictions as a petty wedge that has been used to further divide and splinter the body of Christ. What better use of pride or self-love than to condemn a fellow lover of Jesus simply because they are not like yourself? That is the very epitome of pride! Which we know God absolutely abhors!

So when you come upon fellow Christians who feel God has led them in a different direction than yourself, praise God for His ability to lead them and that they are sensitive to God's direction for their lives. Hey, you could even rejoice that they even adhere to standards as it seems many in the Evangelical church have abandoned them for the deceptively "greener" pastures of the world. The only way to break this vicious cycle is if we each can recognize the Holy Spirit's ability to lead others differently and remain sensitive to how the Holy Spirit is leading us personally. After all, our walk is before God, not men.

The picture was taken of one of my next door neighbors children last summer. I hope you enjoy!

Edited Glimpse into Spain

So, I know this post isn't much to speak of, but I thought I'd post a picture from Spain. It is edited a little bit, but the edits, I trust, only enhance the image itself. Enjoy!

Risk

So I've been doing a lot of thinking lately (one of the major benefits of my current job) and I felt like throwing a question out there. Now I'm thinking about friendships, relationships, and interactions with people; So that is a where this thought is stemming from. You ready?

How much risk is taken when you are genuine with people? I'm talking about genuine, as in, you're not afraid to say, "Hey my day has really stunk!" when somebody asks you how you are doing, instead of the proverbial, "Fine" when all hell is about to break loose in your day. It's risky, I know. And I've come to believe there is a good deal of risk involved. Being genuine means you let down your guard and show some sort of vulnerability. The mask of self-sufficiency comes off, and you allow somebody else to see the real you. Combined with that there is definitely an element of the 'fear of rejection' involved. "What if I'm too genuine, and make a fool of myself" or "I'll be they can't handle the REAL me" may be some of the thoughts that run through your mind. But ultimately, you have to realize you can't control the minds and emotions of other people. Truth-be-told you can't accurately predict others reactions or feelings 100% of the time.

Another thing about being genuine is the 'give and take' nature of that arrangement. You can't be genuine with somebody else, and then simply turn it off when they try and be genuine back. You have to actually care about what the other person is saying, feeling, thinking. You have to ask questions to try and understand what is going on. That there might be the very reason why there aren't as many genuine people in the world as their should be. Because it takes WORK to be genuine and quite honestly, pain. Pain of rejection, pain in trying something new, pain in actually caring and sometimes getting burned because you do care... But it is neat to see that as you are genuine with others, there is a bond of friendship and trust that develops. People will then talk to you about their struggles or their frustrations. So with being genuine comes a lot of responsibility.

So I definitely try and be genuine with others, but I'm struggling myself to understand their trust in me. I mean, people share some pretty darn deep stuff with me, and I'm a bit awe-struck and blown away by their trust. Yet, I know that by telling me, it is doing them some good. I guess this is the pinnacle of counselors struggles. How much do you take upon yourself? And how much do you simply leave at the office? In scripture though, we are admonished to bear one anothers burdens, and thus fulfill the law of Christ. But I guess it doesn't say bear their burdens 'all the way home' which can be comforting.

So I guess the ultimate answer to my original question is, a lot. It takes a lot of risk both in order to reap the benefits as well as the pain of interacting with others. God gave us relationships but how we use them is up to us. How much risk are you taking in you relationships?